David Haan: Irony


Rumormongers have hypocritically insinuated that I make use of cheap irony. Nothing could be further from the truth.

I employ only the finest quality of irony, procured at great expense, its like not to be had discounted. In fact, I do not entrust supply to outside provisioners, but participate at every stage of manufacture, from the selection of raw material (unalloyed, never scrap) through its refinement—forged under sublime pressure, even tempered, under controlled heat, by a process of my own invention. Despite all due precaution, irony can become corrupted, so the results of all this effort may well never see the light of day.…

The Theory of Un-natural Selection

Snaps, Buttons and Diguette’s Theory of Un-Natural Selection

by R. Diguette


Every time I put on a pair of summer shorts I find myself wondering about the lowly metal snap.  It seems to be going the way of the Neanderthal, slowly but surely dying out of existence, perhaps eventually one day to be re-discovered as just another unfortunate victim of the march of time.  In its place we have the plastic button.  But why is this happening?  In what way is the plastic button superior to, or better adapted to survive than, the metal snap?

Consider this.  Metal snaps seldom if ever fall off. …

Yahia Lababidi: Monks of LA


The songs of both these artists are generally perceived as music to slash your wrists to, and playing either of their records at a party signals its certain death (or yours). To their intensely loyal cult following, in the privacy of their bedrooms, they sing to each alone. And by making their anxieties public, these artists are Saviors to brethren of solitaries. Both are literary types; one is a novelist and poet, while the other as a librarian’s son was steeped in literature since youth. Yet both are not great poets, by the admission of one and despite the protestations of the other.

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